Matthew 4:19 «And he saith unto them, Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.»

Fishers. As in fishing. It's a «H» - a H like in Hell.. Is this so hard? But as we reported last week, there seems to be a whole lots of God's Will going on with all sorts of sex acts complete with Bible verse and instructions on the Fisting Is God's Will .

But good lord, one little typo and now the world's largest retailer has a whole new toy line. Sure, I know it was probably a bit dark down in some scribes dungeon and probably that dripping candle wax was distracting the hell out of the boys, but it was an «H» not a «T» - it was supposed to be 'fishing' not fisting.

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The American Civil Liberties Union wants to help make sure the domestic partner registry in the North West Arkansas region remains an option for residents and guests. Your stories of love and commitment are the best way to defeat efforts to ban the registry. If you are a same-sex couple in this region, we want to hear from you now. Please click here and complete our couples survey:

http://www.freedomtomarry.org/stories/page1.asp

All stories count. Especially if you've had some obstacles around the fact your relationship is not legally recognized. Let us know if you or your partner were denied health care, medical decision-making, housing, inheritance, child custody, etc. because you are considered strangers by the law. Even if nothing bad has happened to you, let us know about your loving and committed relationship.

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The latest entrant into Eureka Springs' Domestic Partnership Registry Sweepstakes is our own local representative to the Arkansas Legislature, State Representative Bryan King.

«Personally I oppose the Deomestic (sic) Partner Registry,» King announced in Tuesday's carelessly-spelled press release. «Because of the numerous phone calls and the future impact to our area on this issue, I will say that I am considering asking an Attorney General opinion and possible future legislation regarding city, county or government entities issuing Domestic Partner Registtry's (sic).»

King's debut as a soldier in God's Chosen Army, Traditional Marriage Protection Regiment, is a bold move by our local first-term legislator. Here at home, back in the district, we know King as the poultry and cattle farmer who spent his entire first term trying to get permission from the state's environmental protection agency for poultry farmers to spread leftover chicken manure on cattle grazing lands.

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I guess this all started when a friend emailed me about an email he got from a friend. With me so far? A snippet of the email was more or less what will they («they» being the self proclaimed, saved and named Christians) take over next.

We have Christian Rockers, Christian Bikers, Christian Politics, Christian Motels. Damn. Weren't they content with just having Christian Bookstores? Guess not.

But it got me to pondering. Is there some kind of Christian porn? Christian hot, hot, steamy, sex? You bet your Baby Jesus there is. Didn't take long at all to find there are classes, manuals, sex toys, porn movies and all kinds of smut for salvation sluts. Baby Jesus butt plug and all.

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We're pleased to report that Eureka Springs' Domestic Partnership Registry is bringing piles of new visitors to our quaint little village. This just in from a group that calls themselves Jericho Riders: They say Eureka Springs has «given into Satan and his tactics» so they're coming to pray for us.

Isn't that sweet?

Here in Eureka Springs, we're equally worried about Satan. «Satan» is not his real name; it's just what we call him. But ever since Satan quit his three-night-a-week dish washing gig at the House of Biscuits and Gravy--then spent his final paycheck on yet another blackwork tattoo, three new facial piercings and a bottle of MD 20/20--we've all been worried about his welfare.

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We're not utterly mannerless savages here at Gay News, s0 we think it's only proper to pause, reflect, and share a moment of silent gratitude for Pastor Phillip Wilson--the best little jingle writer in the gay promotion business.

Sure, we'd like to take credit for gems like, «Eureka Springs is a gay Mecca,» or «Eureka Springs is a sex destination» and today, live from the Saint Louis Post-Dispatch, «Come to Eureka Springs — the most homosexual city in the South.»

Is there any officer in the Gay Recruitment Army who wouldn't be proud to pin those brilliant, strategic campaign ribbons on his custom tailored, 100% natural fiber uniform? No? We thought not.

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Those cards, letters and now--computer viruses--keep pouring in from the American Family Association (AFA.) A brief lull was reported on Sunday, while AFA supporters enjoyed fire, brimstone and a hearty dinner of fried chicken and Parker House rolls.

By late afternoon on Monday, Eureka Springs city officials reported that the AFA's messages of Christian love, judgment, retribution and guaranteed involuntary bankruptcy for Eureka Springs now number in the thousands.

Yes, that's right. The same folks who rent their garments and mourned loudly over the homosexuality of SpongeBob SquarePants have targeted Eureka Springs. Why? We can answer that question here at Gay News but the story is a bit counter-intuitive. Try to keep up.

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Gay News Bureau's tipster hotline has been sizzling like a hunka hunka burning love this weekend. It seems that every city official with a pulse, and an email address, has been buried with e-bombs from the American Family Association.

Yes, that's right. The folks who seized their most recent 15 minutes of fame by blaming the Virginia Tech tragedy on evolution and a lack of school prayer have taken a few days off from their national campaign against the dreaded homosexual menace to snap and snarl at Eureka's li'l ol' Domestic Partnership Registry.

They've sent 3,500 «you're going to Hell; we'll personally see to it» emails so far. Stay tuned for Condemnation Watch. We'll let you know how many consignments to the fiery pit we get by Monday.

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(Eureka Springs, AR) -- One hundred seventy three days after four ordinary civilians armed with laptop computers hunkered down in a Eureka Springs living room to Google the subject, the first Domestic Partnership Registry in Arkansas became a reality today.

Even before the doors of Eureka City hall opened this morning, eleven couples--10 gay or lesbian and one straight--had lined up to be among the first Eurekans and the first Arkansans to have their relationships officially recognized by the city. Each couple paid the $35 fee, showed their ID, swore they were in a «relationship of mutual support, caring and commitment» and received a certificate signed by Mayor Dani Wilson and City Clerk MJ Sell.

What had begun on New Years Day 2007 had, six and a half months later, become law. Ordinance 2052 to be exact. It survived three votes by the city council and two ferocious attempts by an anti-gay minister to block it.

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(Eureka Springs, AR) For the second time in two days, an anti-gay minister's eleventh-hour attempt to halt enactment of the state's first Domestic Partnership Registry failed Thursday.

As a result, the Eureka Springs Registry will go into effect as scheduled today (June 22).

Fundamentalist preacher Philip «Flip» Wilson yesterday submitted a fundamentally flawed petition seeking a referendum election to block the Registry, unanimously approved by the city council May 14.

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