In a GQ article entitled, «Is this guy for real?» Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee explains that gay marriage will end civilization. «There's never been a civilization that has rewritten what marriage and family means and survived,» says Huck. Except, of course, for the civilization Huckabee proposes to lead--the United States of America--which has radically redefined marriage several times since the nation's inception.

Here's a news flash: Women and children are no longer the property of the household's alpha male, as they were when the US started writing its many radical revisions of the definition of marriage and family. We've been changing the rules in this great nation of ours since 1830. That's 177 years, Huck. Try to keep up.

Next, Pope Benedict XVI piled on with his claim that gay marriage is on par with nuclear proliferation as a threat to world peace. Gays. Nuclear warheads. Gays win. All righty.

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In its new travelogue video about Eureka Springs, «They're Coming To Your Town,» the American Family Association employs some pretty colorful adjectives to describe our quirky little village, including terms that make those dreaded code words «eclectic» and «mecca» sound downright benign:

• «A national hub for homosexuals.»
• «The San Francisco of Arkansas.»
• «A gay hot spot.»
• «A gay sex tourism destination.»

Huh? Say what? Really?

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Though incessantly threatening to stay away in droves from Gay Mecca, ultra-Christian fringies can't seem to make up their righteous minds.

Boycott--kinda, sorta, maybe, not really I:

Within a week of calling for a «nationwide boycott» of Eureka Springs, the rabidly anti-gay Jericho Riders (so-called) Christian Motorcycle Ministry had an apparent change of heart and announced that it would be returning to hold yet another cast-out-the-queers «prayer walk» in Basin Park December 7.

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It's autumn in the Ozarks, that glorious time of year when trees don their colorful gay apparel in preparation for Fall Diversity Weekend. As is traditional in the weeks leading up to every Diversity Weekend--particularly fall--the HSA (Homosexual Security Agency) division of Gay News has noted a sharp uptick in religious terrorism chatter.

The first thing that caught the attention of alert Gay News readers was a poll on the front page of Eureka's local right-wing newspaper. The question: «How do you feel about the efforts of Eureka Springs Mayor Dani Joy so far?»

Innocent question, no? Perfectly normal thing for a newspaper to ask: «How do you feel about the performance of an elected official?»

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Dear Jericho Riders:

Hey, dudes, thanks for the plug on, jerichoriders.org.

Back atcha, bros.

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Eureka Springs City Clerk MJ Sell issued the 100th Domestic Partnership Registry (DPR) certificate on Friday, August 24th. The happy 100th couple from North Little Rock, AR joined partners from 11 states* who have added their names to the DPR since the registry opened on June 22.

We've been waiting to report this milestone because we wanted to see if the total collapse of civilization predicted by DPR opponents would materialize.

Sure enough, a judge in Iowa suddenly decided that gays and lesbians are American citizens who are equally deserving of civil rights. Americans belatedly realized that loudly-homophobic politicians solicit gay sex in public restrooms. (Right. We know. Surprise, surprise.)

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Hi from Eureka Springs, Arkansas--the funkiest little town in America and perhaps the entire world!

This place has so much character--and so many characters--I can't believe it took me 40 years to discover it. A mere village of just 2,000 people, Eureka Springs is New Orleans meets Aspen meets San Francisco meets Hooterville! I got here two weeks ago today, and I'm here for good!

So how did this Houston-based journalist end up in the alternate universe that is Eureka Springs? After spending the first week of July at the Rainbow Gathering, camped out with 5,000 hippies and freaks of every stripe in the gorgeous Ozark National Forest of Arkansas, my two traveling companions and I descended on Eureka Springs, just an hour's drive to the north, to come down from our Rainbow experience.

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The propagandist never asks «Why?» He needs no justification, but rather only this granite faith. -- August Eigruber

In tonight's episode of Al Watch, we discover that the American Family Association, the radical, right wing organization that, called for a nationwide boycott of Eureka Springs, is making a documentary about our fair city.

As Disciple Jean Merritt explains in the Patriots' Herald,

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Among trial attorneys, there is an unwritten rule that proscribes putting a witness on the stand unless you know in advance what he or she will say. In the courtroom, surprise is not a good thing.

In the court of public opinion, however, the unexpected and unanticipated can be downright refreshing. Unless you're Al Pryor, the publisher of the righteous and rightward leaning Patriots' Herald weekly newspaper.

In last week's edition, Pryor gave his readers six chances to vote on the worthiness of Diversity Weekends, including five opportunities to more or less bash them. A staunch opponent of the Domestic Partnership Registry, Pryor may well have thought he was polling to the choir.

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Matthew 4:19 «And he saith unto them, Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.»

Fishers. As in fishing. It's a «H» - a H like in Hell.. Is this so hard? But as we reported last week, there seems to be a whole lots of God's Will going on with all sorts of sex acts complete with Bible verse and instructions on the Fisting Is God's Will .

But good lord, one little typo and now the world's largest retailer has a whole new toy line. Sure, I know it was probably a bit dark down in some scribes dungeon and probably that dripping candle wax was distracting the hell out of the boys, but it was an «H» not a «T» - it was supposed to be 'fishing' not fisting.

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