Dumbledore is gay!

We knew it.

Here at Gay News, we weren’t a bit surprised when J.K. Rowling outed an imaginary character from her popular, “Harry Potter” series. We always suspected the headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry likes a bit of wand.

One imaginary gay icon reacted swiftly to the news.

“He had to wait until the series was over to come out,” said Tinky Winky with a rueful smile, all the while rummaging through his purse. “Gay cartoons and fictional, fantasy characters face workplace discrimination every day.

“Puh-leeze, girl!” Tinky went on, “Dumbledore was the headmaster of a fictitious school for imaginary children. The non-existent parents wouldn’t have stood for it!”

Sponge Bob Square Pants, who is reported to be on a clothing-optional Atlantis cruise with his pink “sidekick” Patrick Star, was unavailable for comment.

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